10 Delusions Happy People Don’t Subscribe To

So you want to be happy?

Well, there’s only one thing standing in your way according to Lifehack:

You.

Happiness is a choice that only happy people make.

Here are the 10 things happy people don’t believe:

1. Life is fair

Happiness isn’t about always getting what you want.

2. Suffering is bad

You cannot survive this world without at least a little suffering.

 3. I’m in control of things

As hard as you work, and as much as you try to plan it all out, you’re just not in control.

You cannot control the actions or thoughts of others.

In order to reach happiness, happy people accept this inevitable truth and learn to be proactive rather than reactive to life’s surprises and mishaps.

4. People are obligated to love me a specific way

If your happiness is dependent on how other people feel about you, you will never be happy.

 5. Everyone hates me

This is a toxic belief and a delusion, yet sadly a great proportion of unhappy people fall prey to this, which is largely why they are unhappy.

 6. I can’t

If you believe you are incapable and let that belief keep you from happiness, then ultimately you give truth to a self-imposed fallacy.

 7. I have something to prove

Unhappy people seek happiness through approval.

Unfortunately, that approval is impossible to achieve because it is caused by a inner lack, which keeps them constantly striving.

Happiness can only be achieved through self-acceptance. Yours is the only approval you need.

8. It doesn’t matter

“It doesn’t matter” is just an excuse. It’s what unhappy people tell themselves to avoid confrontation when they’ve been mistreated, or to endure a lack of courage when they don’t follow their dreams.

Don’t dismiss your needs to avoid responsibility of your own happiness.Happiness matters. Respect matters.

9. I’d be happier, if only I were [fill in the blank] 

You know your routine. 

I’d be happier, if only I were skinnier, prettier, smarter, the CEO.

Happy people know the secret to happiness is accepting themselves–flaws and all. It’s okay to work on improving yourself–we’re always in a state of learning–but it’s not okay to berate yourself for your flaws.

Focus on your strengths.

10. I’m too old

You are never too old.

Yes, you may look silly.

And, yes, it may be harder than you expect, but it’s never too late to choose happiness.